Lesson 1 – God’s Gift of Marriage

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God’s Gift of Marriage

Marriage is not our invention. It is God’s gift, joined by his Word and sustained by his mercy.

Opening Conversation

1. When you hear the word “marriage,” what picture comes to mind?

God Speaks

Genesis 2:18–24

18 The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”

19 Now the Lord God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. 20 So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field.

But for Adam no suitable helper was found. 21 So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. 22 Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.

23 The man said,

“This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.”

24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

  • God established marriage as a lifelong union of one man and one woman.

Matthew 19:4–6

4 “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ 5 and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”

  • Marriage gives companionship: husband and wife become a new family and a one-flesh union.

Psalm 127:3–5

3 Sons are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from him. 4 Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are sons born in one’s youth. 5 Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them. They will not be put to shame when they contend with their enemies in the gate.

  • God ordinarily blesses marriage with the possibility and gift of children. Children are never merely a lifestyle accessory; they are persons entrusted by God.

1 Corinthians 7:1–5

Now for the matters you wrote about: It is good for a man not to marry. 2 But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. 3 The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 The wife’s body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband’s body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. 5 Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

  • Sexual intimacy belongs to marriage and serves unity, mutual care, and protection against sexual temptation.

Ephesians 5:31–32

31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

  • Christian marriage points beyond itself to Christ’s faithful love for his Church.

Wedding Vows

Asked of husband: Will you take _____ to be your wife?  Will you be guided by the counsel and direction God has given in his Word and love your wife as Christ loved the Church?  Will you be faithful to her, cherish her, support her, and help her in sickness and in health as long as you both shall live?

Asked of wife: Will you take _____ to be your husband?  Will you be guided by the counsel and direction God has given in his Word and submit to your husband as the Church submits to Christ?  Will you be faithful to him, cherish him, support him, and help him in sickness and in health as long as you both shall live?

Spoken by both husband and wife: I, _____, in the presence of God and these witnesses, take you _____, to be my (wife/husband).  I promise to be faithful to you as long as we both shall live.

Gospel Connection

The vows of marriage are serious because our promises matter. They are also made by sinners. The deepest hope of a Christian marriage is not that two people will never fail, but that Christ has been faithful to them. His cross supplies forgiveness; his Word teaches faithfulness; his mercy gives strength to begin again

Talk It Through

1. Where did your picture of marriage come from?

2. What do you most look forward to about being married? What do you fear?

3. What does “as long as we both shall live” require when feelings fluctuate?

4. How should Christian spouses think about children?

5. What would faithfulness look like if your marriage passes through a very difficult season?

Vows Before Feelings

Read the marriage vows aloud to each other. Circle every promise that depends on an action rather than an emotion. Discuss why vows are especially valuable on days when feelings are weak.

Take-Home Conversation

Tell each other one promise you most want to keep well in your marriage and one circumstance in which keeping it may be difficult.

Prayer

Lord God, you created marriage and call it good. Keep us faithful to your Word, humble in repentance, rich in forgiveness, and steadfast in love. Prepare us to make our promises with joy and to keep them by your grace; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.